Today my youngest child, my baby, turns FOUR years old! I've honestly already cried twice today and it's not even noon here yet! lol
The years have gone by entirely too fast and it seems like just yesterday I was pushing against his foot as he kicked inside my stomach. *sniff* Now he's that gorgeous child you see on the left side of my banner up there. His smile alone can melt your heart and when he says "Are you happy at me?", you are lost forever.
My MonkeyBoy is a healthy, tall, skinny blonde haired blue-eyed boy who loves to talk, walks on his tiptoes like his Daddy, and can tell the names and facts of over 20 different dinosaurs. He loves watching the Animal Planet and Discovery Science channels as well as Little Einstein's whenever he can catch it. His brother and sister are his best friends and the love/don't like relationship between the three of them is every mother's dream. My oldest two children would give their lives for their little brother and in return MonkeyBoy gives his undying devotion and love.
My youngest child has made me fall in love with all three of my kids all over again. Just watching him over the last four years grow, love, and learn has reminded me of when the older two were little. I've watched them all interact and it has brought me closer to my preteen and teen when I thought my attachment issues would push them away. They all try me at times but in the end I fall more in love with them everyday and realize more and more what fantastic people all three of them are.
When MonkeyBoy was born I knew our "circle" was complete. I didn't yearn for another child or even consider having another one. MonkeyBoy was the final piece to our puzzle and I felt so complete and fulfilled at that moment. Big B and Sis were there with me all through labour and at the birth (although they stepped outside during the actual birthing part) as well. They saw their baby brother right after he came into the world and have been by his side ever since. I couldn't ask for a better big brother and sister for MonkeyBoy than the two he has.
I have changed so much from when I had my first two children. I breastfed MonkeyBoy until he was a little over 2 years old (and only stopped because of my cancer surgery). I carried him around in a baby sling (and always wandered where these things were when I had the first two!) everywhere we went. He has slept in bed with his father and I from day one and it has been such a wonderful experience. It's nice having him to snuggle with while Daddy is working graveyard shift. On the weekend he clings to Daddy in his sleep and even tosses an adorable little arm around his neck as he rolls over. Almost always this is followed by a look of deep love and a kiss by Daddy before he goes back to sleep. Soon he will have his own bed and his own room but for now he's our snuggle buddy and my little personal heater. lol
Today my youngest baby is four and later today he will open a few presents, have a mini Cinnamon Swirl bundt cake to celebrate his special day, and watch a movie tonight of his choosing. He had heart shaped toast with PB&J for breakfast (his request) and hot cocoa. Tonight we will have spaghetti for his special dinner and on Saturday a few friends are coming over to have Bug Mountain Cake and ice cream plus he'll get the rest of his presents then too.
To me this day is huge but to him (because of his age) it's just another day. He's enjoying getting away with little things today like playing his VSmile, tooting on his sister and laughing about it, and currently running around half naked. To him this is what a birthday is about. He doesn't feel or look any different when he looks in the mirror.
I see a baby becoming a child. I see chubby little hands becoming sure and steady child hands. I see the baby with the serious face when you talked to him becoming a serious child who explores his world to the fullest asking questions every step of the way. I see.... one of the most amazing people I've ever met in my life.
I use to worry about whether or not anyone would remember me after I die but now when I look at my children I could care less because I now know that after I'm gone there will still be three perfect parts of me sharing their love and wonder for life with others. They complete me and I've never felt more at peace in my life than I do today... on one of my baby's birthdays.
Happy Birthday, MonkeyBoy! I will do my best to make sure that I am here to celebrate many many more with you. I love you and adore you more everyday and thank you for choosing me to be your mommy.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Today my youngest child, my baby, turns FOUR years old! I've honestly already cried twice today and it's not even noon here yet! lol
Friday, November 17, 2006
I just want to apologize to the people who actually read and follow this blog that it has been so long and then the one post I did do was about a deadbeat dad. So I'm sorry and thank you for sticking around still. That's also where the hug comes in too. :) Many hugs to everyone who has checked for updates and stuck around. It means alot to me and I will try not to take such a long hiatus again.
Let's cover the basics- same crap as usual with the medical stuff except they've added yet another med to the menagerie (it was actually by my request but now I think it's stupid). That is six that I'm on because of the fibro, CMP, and PN and just three that I'm on because of missing organs. LOL. I can't help but laugh that I'm on more for the pain than I am for cancer or organs. My new nickname should be "Train Wreck". hehe
Second- kids are doing well. Monkey Boy (formerly known as Lil Man- he swears he's more monkey and NOT little!) has a slight cold and stuffy nose right now but he's currently running around in his Superman jammies (no he's not STILL in his jammies, he just put this on instead of clothing. lol. If it wasn't so cold you can bet he'd just be nekkid!) and cape. I don't have the heart to tell him that the jammies are a size too small this year and will have to go. I don't have the heart because he'd want new ones and we're so broke at this point that it just ain'ta happenin' ya know?
Third- and this is a biggie, we are hoping to close on our very first home on December 20th. It's both exciting and scary to say the least. It is a very nice house that we got for about $40,000 less than what it's worth because it's a foreclosure so that part is great. There is room for everyone, it's in a fantastic neighborhood (makes you think of Leave it to Beaver. lmao), there is a park and duck pond, there are walking and bike trails, and the neighbors are very friendly. Oh and we will finally have A YARD!!! Yes, after over a year of no yard at all we will finally have a nice sized one for these kids to play in!! Giving my children a home has been a dream of mine for 15 years and being alive to see it come true has brought me to tears many times in the last month. Yes, I'm being a big baby. ;)
The bad part is that it's a 20-30 minute ride into town so that screws the kids on their homeschool park days, spending the nights at friend's often, volunteering whenever they want at the WildLife Rescue, and such. :( I am trying my best to make sure that they get to have someone spend the night (or vice versa) at least once a month and we attend park days once a month as well so they can still be around their friends here but it's still sad. Everytime these kids get comfortable somewhere we have to move and they lose everything. It just plain sucks ass in my opinion!
News that I'm soso on is that MonkeyBoy is turning FOUR at the end of the month. My youngest baby isn't a baby anymore. :( He swears up and down that he wants to stay little so he will always be my little boy but as I told him, he will always be my little boy no matter how big he gets. It still sucks though! lol
I have so much I wanted to post about over the last month or two but now it feels like it would be too late to tell you about it. :( We went to a pumpkin patch with some friends at the beginning of October and had a fantastic time! The place was great and we went on a hayride, then picked out pumpkins from a field (Big B's was over 40lbs), saw a bull with immensely long horns, played in a cornbox (instead of sand it was dried corn, kinda neat), mined for gemstones, went through a maze, and all kinds of great stuff. It was a wonderful mixture of wonderful company and a wonderful place.
Also in October, the kids and I went to see Phantom of the Opera. The show was absolutely amazing and I am so glad we went. The looks on Big B and Sis' faces as they watched the show was priceless and something I will never forget. What made it even more amazing was that the company was the one from Toronto, Canada. The reason that is amazing is because I have wanted to see the Toronto production since I was 14 years old and now I have. :) I highly recommend seeing it and if you homeschool then you may be able to get discounted tickets like the schools do. ;) That is how I was able to take all three kids because otherwise it would have been way too expensive.
November hasn't been much more than trying to buy the new house and doctors' appointments for me every week. I'm giving the Cymbalta (for my fibro) one more month and then probably going off it because it doesn't do anything for me anymore. :( Oh well, at least we tried and now it's on to something else.
Thank you all for sticking around and I will get some fun posts up real soon.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
*Updated with a picture of Mr Coiner. .*
I'm sorry to my regular readers that I haven't been around lately. Due to pain and other things going on I just haven't had the energy but I appreciate you always checking for new posts and promise I will give you one soon.
This post is for whoever have been Googling Big B's donor's name lately- Kirk A. Coiner. I feel that if someone (especially another woman) is interested enough to google the name then they may want some information to go with it.
Fact 1- Mr. Coiner owes his firstborn son a current total of $18,462.95 . Mr Coiner owes this amount because for seven years he refused to pay his child support which at the time was only $134.00. Anytime the Child Support Division would try to attach his wages he would quit his job. They couldn't take his income tax return because he didn't file one from 1997 on.
Fact 2- Mr Coiner stood up in court and actually complained when the judge told him he would pay a higher child support amount. It seems Mr Coiner could not pay his previous child support but he could get the money to fly from Oregon to Pennsylvania. You can read what happened here.
Fact 3- Mr Coiner is full aware that his 15 year old son has a rare genetic disorder that causes endocrine cancers. He is also aware that in March of 2005 our son had to have a total thyroidectomy because medullary cancer had already began in him. This means my son will be on lifelong thyroid and parathyroid supplementation. Mr Coiner is SUPPOSE to pay 100% of Big B's medical bills. Instead he paid nothing and that includes child support. He has offered no help nor made any honest effort to show his son that he matters.
Fact 4- Out of the last year Mr Coiner has paid FULL support a total of four times. Four months out of twelve I have recieved a full payment. This stopped when Mr Coiner again quit his job.
Fact 5- The State of Oregon has had to begin proceedings against Mr Coiner to revoke his license at least twice. Of course, Mr Coiner has figured out a way to beat the system and makes sure to pay $20-$25 once every three months to keep his license. Personally I find this disgusting and if it is so important for him to keep his license then maybe he should use it to GET A JOB!!
Fact 6- My husband has had to cover Big B on his insurance because unlike Mr Coiner, we care about whether or not Big B lives. As I said, Mr Coiner is suppose to cover my son on insurance and any bills. Instead my husband and I not only fully support Big B but are also left to pay all co-pays for him as well. As his mother I understand that this goes with the territory and will do whatever it takes to keep my son healthy. His co-pays alone are $75 a month. That may not seem like a whole lot but my daughter (not Mr Coiner's) also has MEN2a and had the same surgery plus I have numerous health problems myself. This means our total copays each month are at least $250 and most times more. This is a very big dent in our income especially when nothing is coming in by way of child support to help out.
I could go on all day but I'm trying to keep this to the facts only. Mr Coiner (no, not you Wifey 3) is more than welcome to TRY to dispute these facts but unfortunately, they are indisputable. I would much rather not have to drag my dirty laundry onto the blogosphere but obviously someone is looking for information on him and I feel they should have the correct information.
Feel free to email me if you are in need of any other information that may be instrumental to your purposes- habits, work history, etc. Thank you.
To my readers, just skip this post and I'll give you a good one in the next few days.
I'd also like to add that you can find him on myspace.com as krikcoin and also as kirkulus1. Funny, it says he's single on there. Does wifey 3 know this?
Legal Blah Blah ;) *All the information in this post is able to be proven through court documents, affidavits, and medical reciepts. This post is for information purposes only and should be used as such.*